Conan the Ovarian

Couple buy a copy of Conan the Barbarian and shortly afterwards a box of eggs goes back, I open and examine the eggs. " I'm Conan the Ovarian", I say. I am pleased with myself and as good as philately gets you everywhere of earlier in the week.

I am very delighted to find out that one of my articles was used as a teaching aid on newspaper reporting in a school in Stoke. I believe that it was the one on the Ecton Copper Mine.

Discussed with couple who bought places to avoid. Iraq I would think as a holiday destination and I understand that Columbia is no Frinton and I guess that Burma is not a South East Asian Denmark. I have high hopes for Libya all that Mediterrainian coast line and great Roman remains. I gather Tripoli is an attractive city.

Man who works for a brick making company tells me that it employs 26 people when it used to employ 2,000. The bricks are very much in demand for projects in the South of England

If foodbanks are the answer, then its a funny bloody question being asked

Early on in the shift and the question of food banks came up and with the first customers there was evident disgust at the remorseless rise of the food bank as a modern day arm of social services. One woman said that it was the fault of people who " spent money on fags". I pointed out that many of the people using them were actually in work and with the price of food going up plus the costs of energy by about 12 % then its easy to see how people are running out of money to meet even the basics..

Chatted to a Policeman about the work and whether it gave him a jaundiced view of human nature. To his credit he said no. He had worked with Scouse colleagues who he deemed worse than the criminals. He also mentioned the program on Scunthorpe. Is this a fair representation of the poor? I am sure there are people on that estate who are trying to do the decent thing.

Woman who has done very well from dealing in stamps- it grew out of a hobby- it seems philately will get you everywhere.

Wimbledon is on us. I have little interest in it when I was at Wigan CHC the assistant used to fall mysteriously ill during the period of the tournament. Strange that?

My favourite customer we spoke about Zappa and he was a great fan of "Hot Rats". On a walking holiday one of my mates was obsessed with a Zappa track " Help I'm a rock". We walked past a loch and my mate would shout out as we passed a boat " Help I'm a boat, I" turning into a boat".

O death where is thy sting

Customer who buys Sentinel. He does not know why as it is very poor "value for money" on Saturdays with the pull out sections reduced to a few page inserts. I tell him that many of the articles are given freely and its an example of the "something for nothing" culture that for once is not attached to benefit claimants.

Glasgow chap intrigued that the new President of Iran lived in Glasgow in the 70s. We wondered if he had a "stoner" a deep fried kebab which incidently the local dialect word for an erection.

Scots woman from Caithness is voting no in the referendum or would if she was not living in Leek.

Woman enthuses about a holiday of a life time in China and lived a trip on the Yangtze " Yangtze O Yangtze O river of fish".

Discussed WC Fields and the story of man who died in a vat of whisky " O death where is they sting" Fields is supposed to have said.

Gene Krupa

Chatted to a bloke who said that he had a collection of 17th century pamphlets on the English Civil war. I am intrigued and I said that I would get in touch. Anyway we shall see.

Man works for JCB well he did until he was made redundant and re-employed via an agency on less pay and worse conditions. That figures.

Not a one for the soaps but obviously people are. the last time I saw a soap on a regular basis was the late 90s when Spider and Fred were in " Coronation St"

Earlier in the day I had taken P to school and they were playing Gene Krupa on the radio. We were in a line of traffic and I took the opportunity to mime drum playing which was all too much for my daughter who begged me to stop. Still I enjoyed it

My kinda town Louth is

Woman wearing " I love music" tee shirt. What I thought all music? Surely there must be some gaps. Apparently not, as she liked C and W. I tried a curved ball and asked her whether she like Jazz. "I play saxophone in a jazz quartet", she replied. So it was true she did like all music.

A man asks for a wine carrier. I tell him that you had to do a magic pass over the container in order to open which I duly did.

Tourist from Louth in Lincolnshire and she works for the company as a check out operator. It gave me the opportunity to compare notes. She did not like women teachers as customers. Invariably they think they are superior. She liked elderly couples from out lying villages and the fact that you could build a rapport with them. Rather followed my thinking.

She did say that they had an irate customer who hurled a Swede- vegetable rather than nationality- down the aisle. Perhaps its a Lincolnshire custom?

Bobbie Zee

Had great chat with young man who was Dylan nut and the question of the greatest Dylan album was raised predictably I went for "Blood on the Tracks" while he liked the early stuff especially John Wesley Hardin which led to a brief chat about " All along the Watchtower" and Hendrix, the greatest cover ever?.

I wonder why Rudyard's war memorial has a 1921 date on the bottom. Just for fun did they not tell the good people of Rudyard after November 1918. On a serious note I wonder if it takes in the War of Occupation in Russia or even Ireland.

I used to remember Theakston's Old Peculiar was called Yorkshire's Lunatic Broth and I wonder whether certain sensitivity has crepted in. Actually I like Masham the place where its brewed. I used to drink it in the De Grey Rooms in York which was the only place where you could get it. It certainly a very heady brew

Woman from Kirkcaldy. I mention Raith Rovers and Adam Smith evident pride when it came to Gordon Brown less pride and a certain amount of muttering.

The conversation about puns made me think of Jim who died in 2011 and the incident in a restaurant in Florence when Jim spying the understaffing, the coach load of Asians and the resultant chaos " Too many Indians and not enough chefs, he opined.

I don't associate Essex with Eagles

I once saw Tarantino at the Corner house in Manchester when they showed " Reservoir Dogs" around about 1993. That memory came to mind when a bloke got Quentin latest film  which I gather is good but violent. I am of an age that shrinks against violence in film, give me "High Society" and Bing  anyday.

Man on the cricket match he saw at the weekend in Leek Derbyshire Falcons against Essex Eagles. I for one do not associate Essex , once famously described by old man Steptoe as "flat as a witches tit", with the most majestic of all raptors. I do associate Essex with Ian Dury and  Billericay Dickie which I sang to the customer " A love affair with Nina, in the back of my Cortina, a seasoned up hyena could not have been more obscener, she took me to the cleaners and other misdemeanours". he begged me to stop because it might jeopardise my job. Under the circumstances Essex Blockheads would have been better.

I ask a woman whether she knows the difference between an Eccles Cake and a Chorley cake- its in the pastry.

I start to doze off and start using different techniques to keep awake although I recognise a check out operator dropping off does not have the same ramifications as a airline pilot