Monday 1 September 2014

The man who looked liked Rob Wilton: 5th September 2011



TfTT 493. Received info from company on how to talk to customers. Decide to put it to the test. Man enjoys reading books about warfare esp the SAS.

TfTT 494 Guardian reading woman likes Guardian Crosswords although does not like Charlie Brooker.

TfTT 495 Woman buys lots of noodles for teenage sons- They won’t eat anything else. Feel that there might be a vitamin deficiency issue.

TfTT 496 Woman tells me that her husband is a security adviser in Iraq and how dangerous it was.

TfTT 497 Man did not see England game as it was on Sky and it was too expensive to get now.

TfTT 498 Man buys catfood and tells me that cat is very choosy.

TfTT 499. Man wearing Foxfield Sweatshirt. A volunteer who works at weekend.

TfTT 500 Cheerful East Enders from Poplar on holiday in area. Know the “Blind Beggar” in Whitechapel. Kray Brothers territory. Know it myself but have never drank with Ronnie or Reggie.

TfTT 501Man is pickling his own beetroot.

TfTT 502 Man buys Tripe. he has been eating it for 54 years. He likes Haslett as well

TfTT 503 Mention person that I know who has grown the countries most northerly fig.

TfTT 504 Couple buy luggage tags as they are off for holiday in Spain.

TfTT 505 Woman buys dogfood for her rescued dog. It’s a whippet although she has had many dogs that have been rescued.

TfTT 506 Nicely package Border biscuits that woman has brought for early Xmas present.

TfTT 507 Show judgement of Solomon by giving exact number of school vouchers to two children.

TfTT 508 Man like I newspaper and prefers it to Telegraph.

TfTT 509 Woman with Jamaica top she is from the island and goes back to visit her family every three years.

TfTT 510 Man with Chatsworth bag. He loves the house especially the grounds and the farm. I agree it’s probably the best kid areas play area around.

TfTt 511 First day at school tomorrow for small boy. He’s excited at the prospect.

TfTt 512 Man buys many bottles of Ruddles. Its cheap a £1 a bottle. I had a mate who suggested “ Make puddles with Ruddles” as slogan the brewery were not interested.

TfTT 513 Why Tiger bread? A question that perplexes a customer and I.

TfTt 514 Man like Lloyd Grossman sauces but could not stand the bloke. It’s the accent. I agree.

TfTT 515 My former French teacher comes through. He still walks 5 miles a day and likes walking around Rudyard Lake.

TfTT 516 Family from Bakewell who think that market is going down hill.

TFtt 517 Another small child excited at going to school for the first time
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TfTT 518 Man with Manchester accent still very strong. He had worked as an engineer in Basel for 8 years and still kept it. Cannot take Manchester out of a person, he says
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TfTT 519 Woman studying reflexology and really enjoying it.

TfTt 520 Man comments on my Mastermind appearance and asks me if I am having another go. Perhaps I say.

TfTT 521 Woman from Brown Edge. I ask about the previous vicar with the very long beard. Makes him look like Rasputin she say. I hope not for the people of Brown Edge sake..

TfTt 522 Woman buys shower curtain. I mention Psycho. She looks a bit worried. I mention the letter that Hichcock comment about receiving a letter from a woman whose daughter would not bathe or shower after seeing Psycho and the French film Les Diables.

TfTT 523. Woman tells me that that she saw Jimmi Hendrix in Hanley in 1967 and Manfred Man in Buxton as well as others. I say that she must have been a groovy chick

TfTt 524 Man misses whisky and cannot afford. Also misses cigarettes. “ Wing us a woodie over the wow wut" I say.

TfTT 525 Parents complain about the expense of holidays.

TfTT 526 Man buys a egg poacher. Looks like Rob Wilton.

Sunday 31 August 2014

Roobarb and Custard- Tales from the Till



I do Sybil impression when Basil comes past me. Chance to do one liners from F Towers

 Woman buys Rhubarb and Custard Sweets. I do the tune. She looks at me blankly. Same with person ignorant of Basil Fawlty 

People ignorant of Basil Fawlty and Rhubarb and Custard 70s cultural icons both. Dumbing down I think

Young couple have great grand dad who is 100. He was in the Navy during the War. Tell them they ought to write his life

Almonds. I am told that they smell like strychnine I tell a shopper. A friend of mine who is a doctor once saw a copy of the medical Tripos for Cambridge for 1911 in a second hand book shop. She told me that it was broadly similar to the one she took although perhaps not the same reliance on strychnine. On the question of almonds there is a 16th century expression “feeding almonds to the parrot" which means bribing officials, if press reports and police investigations are to be believed it seems to go on with some officers in an authority not too far from Leek.